God's Greatness

Despite of the trials that I went through to find the true meaning of happiness I was hoping that in the end of the road I would discover the happiness that I long for.

In every station that I passed by I have learned, the pain and happiness. The pain who succeeded to reside in my mind rather than the encountered happiness, pain that leaves a mark in my heart, and caused me to hate the world. Instead of using those learning’s as I continue the journey I again experience the bitterness of it. I never learned because love and care is what my heart’s aspiration, seeing even a miniature love and care from the people I encounter my heart falls in easily. A soft and a breakable heart are streaming in my personality. When the biggest trials came into my life, I said to myself that I would harden my heart for it not being abuse again, but hardening a heart is such a difficult process. Though I did not put myself on a hurry, one day I noticed my heart was shovel as a stone. I wondered and asked to myself why it suddenly changed conflict with my belief that it was a difficult process. Prior to the question, the answer was a relentless pain caused by my fellow and me alone.

Suddenly as a result of my harden heart my life have changed, here I found that having a hard heart is much more difficult. If before I wanted to solidify it because I thought that the reason of all the agonies was my being a soft hearted I am wrong. Having a hard heart is not only a Calvary for me but also to others. I did not just hurt myself but even those people that I treasured the most. During the times that I need to be soft for them, I did not get it done. I feel like I am becoming a bad person that is why I prayed to have an understanding heart, neither soft nor hard; a heart that is inline to what the creature wanted me to have.

A dear friend of mine invited to me joined them in a worship service and I have granted her request, I know in myself that I believe in God the father but I also have the belief that every time I draw close to him I got a lot of problem and it all get worse. A one day of endowment changes my life, the day has not even finished yet but he already shows me that my belief was wrong. He gave me real friends and a job; he might not give me the heart that I wanted but I am very thankful for the changes he made in my life. Little by little, he healed my wounded heart; he filled up my thirsty heart and poured all his tender love and care that I have long for in this world.

As my journey continuous, my heavenly father is always with me, the father who never leaves me, who never fail to provide all my needs, and who has always been the source of inspiration. From all the rocky roads that we passed through we never give up as he always lend a hand to me every time I slip away. When I am tired he raise me up, along with our journey he taught me how to be strong in every trials in life. His promised is to never leave me even if my journey ends because when it happens we will both rejoice for our victory in the end.


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